


C’mon, Guys, Let’s Go Play!

by MermaidMayonnaise



Series: The Boyfs Deal w/ My Problems (Vent Fics) [1]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Can you tell which subject I hate the most, I'm bad at feelings but guess what here they are anyway, M/M, Michael talks about a conversation that made his day, Not to sound clingy but if y'all don't validate me it makes me sad, Self-referential to the point of incomprehensibility, This is short because I have chemistry homework, kinda sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-08-03 17:54:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16330829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MermaidMayonnaise/pseuds/MermaidMayonnaise
Summary: “You know how I’m really shy, antisocial, and I hate new people; there’s no discrimination with me because I despise everyone!" Michael said, waving his arms around. "Eventually, though, my shell came down around Brooke and I started talking to her. It turns out that Brooke is actually a really cool person, Jer!”-------------------------------------------------------------------In which Michael might have accidentally made a friend and subsequently dissects his feelings clinically and efficiently.Who's he kidding? He tells it to Jeremy.





	C’mon, Guys, Let’s Go Play!

**Author's Note:**

> (I never know projecting was a real thing until I began reading fanfic.)  
> Everything Michael said about writing stories in his head to deal with his problems is a thing that I do. I wanted to write this as a scene b/c it's really meaningful to me. I guess you'll see why.  
> (The title was just something random that I thought of when writing the scene. It's one of audio clips from my marching band show last year.)  
> Enjoy.

Michael vividly remembered when Brooke became his friend, mainly because he related it to Jeremy in excruciatingly vivid detail as soon as he came over to his house.

The door slammed it open with a _Wham!_ as Michael kicked it open with his foot, but not before peeping in to see if Jeremy was directly on the other side of it (he had done the same thing in marching band and kicked it right into one of the color guard’s faces.)

“Jer! Guess what? I made a friend!” he yelled, throwing his arms in the air.

Jeremy, whose nose was buried in his AP Chemistry textbook and was reading quietly until Michael barged in, looked up, inwardly sighing at being rudely jerked out of his private studying session, party of one. Still, he was happy for Michael. “That’s great, Michael! Who?”

“Brooke!”

Jer himself had partially made up with Brooke sometime before, which basically was just him apologizing over and over for treating her terribly and generally being a dick. They weren’t good friends, but they were now on talking terms, which was a step up than before the pre-Squip era. “ _Brooke Lohst?_ How?”

“Well, you know how the teacher assigns seats in French class? She paired me up to sit with Brooke. It’s just how our last names work- Lohst is next to Mell, and it’s alphabetical.”

Jeremy waited for him to finish explaining and to get to the point. There was no point in rushing him; if Jeremy brought it to his attention, Michael would deliberately take the longest path. Physically and conversationally. (And possibly mentally, if he wanted to antagonize Jeremy. Michael could be annoyingly stubborn at times.)

“Anyway,” Michael continued, “you know how I’m really shy, antisocial, and I hate new people; there’s no discrimination with me because I despise everyone! Eventually, though, my shell came down around Brooke and I started to open up to her. It turns out that Brooke is a really cool person, Jer!”

“Did you not think she was?” said Jeremy, confused. “I thought you always assumed the best in people.”

“Wait, no, Jer.” Michael shook his head. “That’s not it at all.”

Maybe when you know someone for a really long time, your perception of them is changed and warped. Or maybe it never changed, and you keep static images of people in your head that no longer hold true for the people in the present. This relates to the theme of when a person clings to static images of people in their life, failing to acknowledge their multifaceted and dynamic nature then you are destined to live in the past, with clouded judgement, kept from having mature relationships. Thanks, AP Lit. You’re a big help- see, there _is_ a real-life use for you!)

“I _always_ assume the worst in people before I get to know them,” Michael corrected him. “ _Then_ I assume the best. But that doesn’t actually matter.”

Jeremy opened his mouth to argue before Michael cut him off with a finger pressed to his lips in a shushing motion. Michael’s lips, not Jeremy’s. He took a deep breath and continued telling his story.

“We started talking about things… I don’t know, just like random stuff. It turns out that we both have a lot in common. Some examples… Oh! We both like music and writing, and we both think the French teacher is absolutely _insane_. We can’t stop talking!

“You know I usually walk to the bus alone because I don’t have any friends in that class. Not even acquaintances; it’s actually super sad.” He frowned, forehead creasing. “Well, one day when Brooke and I were talking we just... ended up leaving class together without ending our conversation. To be honest, I was having such a good time that I didn’t even notice until she had turned into a different hallway to go to her bus.

“So that was cool. We didn’t walk together since then, though, because I usually run to meet you in the hallway since we’re on the same bus. Y’know, being next door neighbors and all.”

Jeremy loved Michael as a bro, but he was also getting tired of the story and, more importantly, his textbook wouldn’t read itself. “Is that it?”

“Jesus Christ, you are so impatient.”

“No!” Jeremy hastened to assure him. Michael didn’t talk about his feelings often (when sober), but Jeremy also had some homework to do that he’d been procrastinating on. “Schoolwork can wait. Stories from my fav-wite--” Michael stuck his tongue out at him “--person are more important.”

“So today we were talking, as usual, and being idiots, also as usual.” Michael snickered. “She wouldn’t stop throwing her chapstick in the air, but that’s another story. The bell rang, signaling the end of class and it just so happened that we packed up and left at the same time. We weren’t talking and having a conversation at the moment and she talked to a teacher in the hallway for a couple seconds, so I kinda assumed we weren’t walking together.

“So I did that thing where you slow down your walking pace so you fall out of step and effectively exit the conversation. No big deal, everyone does it. Brooke is popular and has lots of friends and is much higher on the social caste system than I am, so she probably doesn’t want to talk to me outside of class. I guessed, y’know, that we had the type of ‘friendship’ where we only talk in class, just because it’d be awkward if we sat in silence. I turn away and start to check my phone.

“Suddenly, Brooke finishes talking to the teacher and turns to me, opening her mouth to continue the conversation. She saw that I was behind her, so she reduced her speed and looked back at me and said, ‘Well? Are you coming?’ and then she started the conversation back up again and we walked the rest of the way together.” He paused.

Jeremy waited a few more seconds before asking, “Is that it?”

“Yep.” He popped the ‘p’.

“Michael, man, I’m happy for you and all, but what got you so excited about this? It’s just you being social and building a bond with Brooke.”

Michael looked thoughtful. “I’m not sure. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and I even did this weird thing that I do where I write about it in a short story to sort out my thoughts. This paragraph was the hardest to dictate, even in my head.

“I guess… I’m happy that someone was nice to me? No, that’s not it, because I don’t get bullied like I used to anymore. Oh! I think it was because I felt-- no, you’re going to think I’m stupid for saying this.”

Jeremy finally got up from his nest of blankets on the floor, putting down his textbook with a dull thump and taking Michael’s hands in his. “Michael, I’d never think your feelings are dumb. You can tell me anything, man.”

Michael took a deep breath. “I guess I felt… special. That this person that I’d never talked to before until, through some twist of fate, we were seated next to each other in seventh period French. This person actually wanted to take some time out of _her_ day and talk to _me._ Because she likes who I _am_ , Jeremy,” he said, emphasizing certain words as if that would get the point across better. “She enjoys my company and wants to talk to me, not just in class, but outside of class too.”

Michael shrugged. “I mean, I love you, man, but I’ve also known you forever. As best friends, we’re obligated to talk to each other. Brooke… she’s practically a stranger.”

“I think that’s called a friendship, Michael,” Jeremy said gently. “I mean, I only got more friends recently and became somewhat more social myself, but that’s what it feels like. That’s what having friends feels like. It’s having people who appreciate you and want to take time out of their own day to spend with you because they like who you are and enjoy your company.”

“It’s... nice. I feel wanted, I guess. I feel like, that maybe I belong, I fit in, I’m... normal.” He sniffled slightly, wiping his nose. “I’m not Weird Antisocial Headphones Kid. I’m Michael. And people want to be friends with me.”

“Michael,” Jeremy told him, “You are smart enough, good enough, and god damn it, people like you. I’m glad you’re finally starting to see that.” He puffed up like a proud mama bird. “And that, Michael, is what personal growth looks like.” Michael was pulled into a crushing hug as Jeremy squeezed him tightly. “I’m proud of you. Keep it up.”

Michael wiped his eyes. “Thanks. I don’t know I’m getting so emotional over a stupid conversation. Like, it was literally just a conversation with Brooke.” He chuckled, trying to play it off. “Maybe it’s just that time of month.”

Jeremy, catching Michael’s need to let the conversation topic end, dutifully agreed. “That’s sexist,” he said, laughing slightly.

“It’s true, though,” Michael acknowledged. “Besides, it’s fine as long as you don’t use that phrase to dismiss women’s valid and real emotions. But Jer?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for listening. _You_ are a true friend.”

Jeremy hugged him again then stepped the customary five feet away to deflect all homosexual assumptions. Or, at least, that’s what Michael assumed. He had no way of knowing the thoughts that were going through Jeremy’s mind, the thoughts of Jeremy not being a good enough friend for Michael to make Michael feel this way and the cold feeling in his chest as Jeremy called him a loser with apathy in his voice as he shoved him away in that bathroom.

But those were problems for another day. Right now, it was just the two of them and an empty house (and a tangled mass of repressed emotions and sexual tension that would hopefully be dealt with later).

And a chemistry textbook, of course.

**Author's Note:**

> This was actually super hard for me to make the decision to post this.  
> This one's for you, Jack. You'll never, ever read this, but you made an Antisocial Headphone Kid's day. Thank you.
> 
> My tumblr is mermaidmayonnaise if you want to wax poetic on loneliness.
> 
> Comments make my day, and kudos make the world go round.


End file.
